Dear White Men,
First I’d like to say that you are not all guilty of the following offenses. BUT if you co-sign on this type of behavior you are an accessory. And the last time I checked that is still a crime…
Now that I officially have your attention and your balls (see #5), let us begin….
1. “Hey! Look over there, you just dropped something!”, he says. As he helps you search frantically search for a credit card, a phone or even an earring, he says ” Here, I found it. You dropped my number.” Thanks, but no thanks. I already have your number 1-800-386-2277* programmed in my phone.
2. “You’re a semi-alcoholic.” #wtf Either buy me a drink or get the F*CK OUT of my way.
3. “Let me guess…you’re name is Chenequa or Laquisha or something like that”, he says as he shakes my hand. I reply, “Is your name Mo, short for Moron? or Jack, short for Jackass?”
4. He said: “Twerk for me”. My response, “Only if you go first.” His response, “Umm…NO.” My reponse, “EXACTLY.” #WTF
5. He yanked my hair on the dance floor. and then whispered in my ear, ” I know you like that.” My response? I grabbed his family jewels and whispered in his ear ” just as much as you like this…”
6. He said, “I like ebony girls.” #iamnotapornstar
7. Don’t tell me about every black girl that you’ve been with. This is not a job interview. I do not need your resume.
8. Tell me “that white girl over there is dancing better than you are. ” My prom date tried that line and he ended up on the floor. How did he get down there? My ass knocked him out. #literally
9. Do not take photos of me like I’m a zoo animal. I came here to dance, not do tricks.
10. If you need me to keep going, then you need to keep going…in the other direction. I’m not in the mood, nor do I have bail money…or a babysitter.
with irritation and extreme frustration,