From one curious “explorer” to another….To Lena Dunham, with love B

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Lena Dunham + Not THAT Kind of  Girl

“You know, I always think of myself as sort of ready for every criticism. “ ~ Lena Dunham

Lena dearest,

If you’re going to put your shiz out there then you have to be ready for the backlash // criticism from prudes and “conservative” journalists. Technically they are protected under the first amendment. the same amendment that protects you from prosecution and persecution – but not criticism. #sorryboo

To those same prudes, “conservative” journalists, and to those publications who regurgitate their word vomit:

I swear if I hear the words sexual predator // molester and Lena Dunham in the same sentence I might feel more nauseous than I already do. Damn those Doritos Dinamita and Ruffles Tapito Chips. and yes, I ate both in one night. #dontjudgeme Anywhos my Newsfeed has been flooded with articles either defending or criticizing Lena Dunham or reporting about those who support or abhore Lena’s actions. and quite frankly this whole thing is ridiculous and a misuse of the term sexual assault.

First of all, she was a kid herself when most of this shiz happen. and if you weren’t a curious kid back in the day then that’s probably why we never became friends. Because back-in-the-day when I was a kid [I can’t believe I’m old enough to use this phrase #thankGodblackdontcrack] I was curious what a “weenie” looked like. So when my youngest brother was born I did a little peeking inside his diaper. Big whoop. I think what matters most is what Lena’s intentions were and how her sister – Grace Dunham – feels about it.

FYI: Most sexual predators don’t write about their crimes and attach their names to it. #duh

Now if Grace is cool with it then why is everyone so bent out of shape? Kids are curious. I gave my first hand job in church. during mass. What? I was bored. So now should the church disown me? It was over 10 years ago. It happened and everyone’s moved on. He’s married for Christ sakes. I probably shouldn’t make it worse by taking the Lord’s name in vain but sweet baby Jesus…Mary and Joseph. What? I was taught that as long as you added the other two technically you weren’t using the Lord’s name in vain. #catholicschoollogic

So why am I so bent out of shape? Aren’t I the pot calling the kettle black or whatever that saying is? FYI being black isn’t so bad. My tanning bill is non-existent and I’m co-captain of my local twerk team. #werkit But back to the matter at hand, I know what it’s like to be terrified by a man who makes improper advances and tries to bribe you to perform sexual acts. Now that is sexual assault. So yes, I know the difference. and that’s why I’m so irritated.

If “conservative” journalists want to write about sexual assault then by all means write about it. Write about the hundreds of thousands who suffer sexual assault each year. instead of  how back-in-the-day a suburban white girl did a little “exploring” with her sister. Big whoop.

P.S. I have the biggest [writer’s] crush on you. I heart you, Lena Dunham. in a total non-single black female // stalker kind of way. #ihope

xoxo,

My John HanCOCK

 

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